Here's me working in iPhoto to get the effect for yesterday's jpeg below it. Don't forget that these figures occupy an area only 2 1/2 inches (6 cm) wide by 4 1/2 inches (10.5 cm) high. It looks much larger on the monitor.
VIDEO
I'll say one thing for the stars that stole my blogs, they're good actors. I'm loathe to admit it, but that sort of makes them artists. They've developed their bullshit to an art form. They're probably much better than I'd be at taking material from the page to the stage. (I suck at acting with scripted material. I don't mind occasionally improvising, though.) And I never had to say much when I played my songs in Toronto.
Maybe you can see how an actor is the kind of artist who'd appeal to businessmen, since acting compares very favourably to the vital business task of conducting sales. Actors make superb salesmen. And if they are asked by a customer about a fault that they know to exist in their merchandise, that customer is doomed to walk out of the store with at least one purchased unit of the product in question. Sometimes they gamble: 'How's the ignition? Well, why don't we just hop on in and spark it up?' (Inside the vehicle, before trying the key, the salesman breaks his smile for an instant to close his eyes and clasp his hands to God.) Okay, but when starting with a blank sheet of paper, I'm more advanced. I've never had to pretend I was someone else when I played a song or talked about my life. My conscience would never permit me to enjoy any success I got from lying about my talent. And I care about my soul more and more as I age. If being honest is holding me back from acceptance by an insane industry, so be it.
I hope the girls are enjoying that drawing music I made for them. It's good for colouring, too. Tell them to stay away from the bad children; you know, the ones who steal from the candy store, or get caught smoking in the park. You know what's fun? Making paper dolls. You just need scissors and a piece of paper. And maybe some pencil crayons. They're just like folding paper snowflakes except they're ballerinas. And if you can find some elaborate doilies, you can even give them nice, frilly little underpants. It's fun! Just don't get carried away.
The democratic spirit of the public library's 'have your say' campaign reminds me that another election is coming up soon. Are the Rhinos ready for their glorious upset victory? Are they ready to put all five members of their party into the House of Commons and take over the country? You know, my parents were Tories who even let them put a sign on our front lawn. But they let me go ahead and be a Rhino - at least for that year. It happened during the 1984 elections. We were watching the Rhino candidate on TV as he tossed baloney slices at the camera in response to all of Brian Mulroney's promises. Man, just making the visual association there between Mulroney and baloney was so powerful. And there was no waste of food. He had his frisbee dog standing by off camera to make sure that not a single slice touched the floor.
Me drawing the pencil sketch for the above image:
VIDEO
Me going over the pencil sketch in ink:
VIDEO
Star Copyright Offenders
Transgressor
Works Violated
Area
Period
AC/DC
Easy
music
2007
Beyonce [and Rayanna in 2019?]
Under My Umbrella
music
2008-14
Bieber, Justin
Hit song about 'being a man' (my original recording lost)
music
2007
Blue Rodeo
Close Rendezvous , It Makes Me Wonder , Small Miracles (my original recording lost), Mischief , Redemption , Slings and Arrows , Close Rendezvous , 'The Creed' and other poems.
music, poetry
2007
Bush, George W.
Essay on U.S. Cultural Influence , other mini-essays from March-April 2004
opinion
2004
CNN program
Privileged Information (The Green Bay Hacker)
humor
2007
Carlin, George
See George Carlin's Plagiarism
personal prose
2006-08
Cohen, Leonard
Buck Henry
poetry
2007-14
Colbert Report, the
Clash of the Puritans , War in the Antarctic , other works
humor
2007-11
Coldplay
Fool , Canopy , Slings and Arrows
music
2007-10
Comedy Central Talk Shows
Disembodied cartoon frames and talk show segments , other works
humor
2007
Crystalids, the
All My Money ,
Arise ,
Assault ,
Bonkers ,
Busybody ,
Careful ,
Chair ,
Cheer? ,
Comfort? ,
Control? ,
Crybaby ,
Doors of Love ,
Easy ,
Ectomorph ,
Fantasies ,
Foothead? ,
Forgiveness ,
Free ,
Frenetic ,
Godspeed ,
Harmony ,
Ho Ho and Ho ,
Loose? ,
Lucky Lech? ,
Mambo Fever ,
Mistaken? ,
More Sold Out ,
Morning Shorelines ,
Natural ,
Nonplussed? ,
Outside ,
Prone ,
Rusty ,
Satellite Sam ,
Sense ,
Selfish ,
Size ,
Smile ,
Soliloquay ,
Spoils ,
Telepathy ,
Therapy ,
Thrown Stones ,
Tunnel Vision ,
Ugly ,
Uneven ,
Untoward ,
Widen? ,
other works
music
2007-10
Daily Show, the
Johnny Levelhead , the Lunar Dimension , FOX News Hates (videos stolen) , Straight from the Belt , Ancient American History , Aunt Sally Doesn't Want You , Rules for Snuggling , other works
humor
2007-11
Dateline NBC
Accidentaly Blown , the Porcupine Girls , other works
humor, poetry, music
2007-13
Degeneres, Ellen
See Ellen
humor, poetry
2007-14
Eastwood, Clint
Killer Ending
humor
2007
Ellen
Sappho Asparagus , The Widower , the Holy Roller , Mid-Life Crisis (from 2007's hospital visit) , Talking Nonchalant (2007's YouTube video) , The Civil States? , The Bahn to Buchenwald , Fitness Craze , Girl Logic? , other works
humor, poetry
2007-14
'Eye Guy', the (and brother?)
Don't know their worthless names: see Saturday Night Live
humor, poetry
2007-18
Family Guy
War Story: Robot Robot Monster , War Story: Holy War , Insufferable Confession , Michaelangelo's Slip (currently offline), other works
humor
2007-13
Fey, Tina
See Saturday Night Live
humor, poetry
2004-13
Frum, David
Republican speeches made from my words
opinion
2004
Georgia Straight, the
Who Ripped Me Off, Quiz Time, other works
humor
1996
Groening, Matt
See the Simpsons
humor
2007-13
Hanks Tom
The Veteran
poetry
2007-13
Kimmel, Jimmy
Fred's Friendly Frauleins , the X-Ray Player , Get the Waistcoat , Mother Mayhem (video) , other works
humor
2007-13
Late Night with Conan O'Brien
Portions of the Don't Steal Show , JFK conspiracy sketch , other works
humor
2007-13
Leno, Jay
See the Tonight Show
humor, poetry, music
2007-13
MacDonnel-Douglas
Bird of Prey
music
2007-2010
MacFarlane, Seth
See Family Guy
humor
2007-13
MAD Magazine
Austin Powers I.M.M. , other cartoons in apparent support of Mike Myers Austin Powers fraud
humor
2007-16
MAD TV
Hip Moves , School of Deforming Arts , Tuesday Night Long , the Job , other works perhaps confused by me as SNL crimes, still other works
humor
2007-13
Madonna
Complicit with bad stars during 2008 Vancouver visit
music
2008
Maher, Bill
See Real Time
humor
2007-15
Miller, Dennis
Epilogue: Sneak Peek at My Unpublished Book
original theory
2007
Myers, Mike
Redemption (music), Orcastra (music), Seal of Doom , Austin Powers, see Saturday Night Live for others
humor, poetry, music
2004-13
Nickleback
Fool's Paradise , Just Like You (My reject), Nonchalant ?
music
2007-14
Oasis
Fortune
music
2001-10
O'Donnell, Rosie
Narrative portions of war documentary, 'Shock and Awe'
intellectual property
2007-2018
O'Brien, Conan
See Late Night with
humor
2007-13
Pohler, Amy
See Saturday Night Live
humor, poetry
2007-13
Real Time
'sometimes wearing khaki', political and religious statements
personal prose
2007-15
Rolling Stones, the
Nothing but Ashes , Daylight Dilemma
music
2007-13
Saturday Night Live
(Sketches:)
Bait Bikes ,
Bronson Harley: Portrait of a Badass ,
Cosmic Christ, the ,
Don't Destroy the Kitchen ,
Idiot Stu-dent, the ,
One Thin Grocer ,
Shorn Testimony ,
Thelma Addison's Confusion ,
The Masked Coward ,
Tyranny ,
The Hennessy ,
The Planet of the Grapes ,
The Whoopin of Chet Turtleback ,
The Racoon ,
The Burning Sun ,
Silent Night on the Western Front ,
Patterns of Behaviour (Jane Know-it-all) ,
Chester Windmill Presents ,
Economics Made Simple ,
The Search for Blue November ,
Ears Wide Open ,
Bullscent Artificial Air Freshener ,
Minstrel At Arms ,
Blindsighted Justice ,
The Flying Peacocks ,
'The Rake' Oral Apparatus ,
Orangatang Flavour Crystals ,
The Girls of Nightcast ,
Nightcast: September 22, 2012 ,
Pussy Willow ,
Nightcast: September 15, 2012 ,
War Story: All's Fair in Love and War ,
Nightcast: September 8, 2012 ,
It's Unibrow! ,
It's Unibrow! (Episode Four: Blast in Space) ,
It's Unibrow! (Again) ,
Match Against Machine ,
The Lost Fight ,
Ahead of Their Time: Louis Bombardier ,
Classic Flicks: Portrait of the Scientist... ,
History's Mysteries: Nadia Stalin ,
Meddlin' Mom ,
Nurse Sheridan ,
Classic Flicks: My Fair Hillbilly ,
Pick-Me-Up Decaffeinated Coffee ,
Mystery Movie: Turtleneck: The Vanishing Casino ,
Monday Night at the Movies: The Pilferer ,
'The Fishbowl' Smoker's Helmet ,
'Whiff' Insect Repellant for Men ,
The Lazar Razor ,
'The Shot' Wall Syringe ,
Metaphysical Fitness ,
Vote for Willie ,
'Void' Depressurizing Gum[?] ,
Bigger than the Host ,
Jesus of Vancouver/Canadian Film Festival ,
Professional Wisecracker ,
Stark Raving Mad TV ,
Running on Air ,
Not Without My Money ,
The Dealer (The Collector) ,
Man of His Dreams ,
The Sling ,
End Quote ,
Episode 1/D.S. Show Pilot Sketch - Windox ,
Episode 3/D.S. Show 1 - Securiguard Home Security ,
Episode 4/D.S. Show 1 - Dynamo 5000 Air Gun ,
Episode 5/D.S. Show 1 - Pottypants ,
Episode 6/D.S. Show 1 - Soundproof Suicide Prevention ,
Episode 7/D.S. Show 1 - Max-Mix Protein Powder ,
Episode 8/D.S. Show 1 - Spellbound Spell Checker ,
Episode 9/D.S. Show 1 - Gas-in-a-Stick Man Repellant ,
Episode 10/D.S. Show 1 - Immobiline Paralyzing Cream ,
Episode 11/D.S. Show 1 - Pro-Rate Reputation Salvation ,
Episode 12/D.S. Show 1 - Angel of Stealth Kite ,
Episode 13/D.S. Show 1 - Zit Zapper ,
Episode 14/D.S. Show 1 - Equine Velvet Aftershave ,
Episode 15/D.S. Show 1 - Work-Mate Brand Replicants ,
Episode 16/D.S. Show 1 - Jizz Jar ,
Episode 17/D.S. Show 1 - Breathe Easy ,
Episode 18/D.S. Show 1 - Cart-in-a-Car ,
Episode 19/D.S. Show 1 - The Rocket Self-Playing Guitar ,
Episode 20/D.S. Show 1 - A-WEL Artists Weight Loss Plan[?] ,
Episode 21/D.S. Show 1 - Slobber Guard ,
Siren Siren ,
Atomic Self-Heating Soup ,
Episode 22/D.S. Show 1 - Econoflush Food Recycler ,
Episode 23/D.S. Show 1 - Vengisil Irritating Powder ,
Episode 24/D.S. Show 1 - Primetime Polly ,
Episode 25/D.S. Show 1 - The Mask ,
Episode 26/D.S. Show 1 - Save Dave - Suicide ,
Episode 27/D.S. Show 1 - Save Dave 2 - Protest ,
Episode 28/D.S. Show 1 - Save Dave 3 - Bad Venues ,
Episode 29/D.S. Show 1 - Save Dave 4 - Divine Punishment ,
Episode 30/D.S. Show 1 - Save Dave 5 - Pizza ,
Episode 2/D.S. Show 2 - Bloodfist Interactive Video Game ,
Episode 3/D.S. Show 2 - The Church of the Branch Sectarians ,
Episode 4/D.S. Show 2 - Do-It-Yourself Lawyer[?] ,
Episode 5/D.S. Show 2 - The Hot Seat ,
Episode 6/D.S. Show 2 - Yum Yum Sugar Sauce ,
Episode 7/D.S. Show 2 - Tasty Pastry ,
Episode 9/D.S. Show 2 - Shortcut Guide to Success ,
Love or Money ,
Top Stories 1 ,
Campfire Rock ,
The Straight-Blanket ,
Top Stories 2 ,
The Insomniac ,
Gold Rush 2013 ,
Top Story ,
The Driver ,
The Dating Game ,
The Greed Game ,
Top Stories 4 ,
The Blame Game ,
Update: War in the Bermuda Triangle,
Top Stories 5 ,
The Bermuda Triangle War ,
Treachery! ,
Concentration 'X' ,
Nightcast: March 18, 2013 ,
North American Rebel: Behind the Scenes ,
The Assistant ,
Nightcast: Top Stories (09-03-13) ,
The Job Lovers Club ,
The Cutting Room ,
Pestilence Anti-Pest Pellets ,
The Vanity Mirrors ,
Dead Reckoning ,
Enemy Agent ,
Celebrity Roundup ,
Top Stories 6 ,
Top Stories 7 ,
The Red Menace ,
The Monarch ,
Flames of Compassion ,
The Space Suit ,
Life Shavers ,
Around the Corner (Public Service Ad) ,
Don't Break the Kitchen ,
The Convex Corrective Silkscreen Solution ,
The Multi-Gadge ,
Family Feudalism ,
Henderson Mayfield: Hoot Snatcher ,
Film School Preppie ,
The Local Banter ,
The Police Police ,
Gentrification ,
A Day in the Afterlife ,
Jamie Jong: Outlaw Landlord ,
Movie of the Week: Clarra Claptrap ,
The Life of Martin, Word Inventor ,
Loving Blindness ,
Extreme Irony ,
The Defector ,
Safer Sex with Polly Foolscap ,
Head Case Files/Jerome Adirondack ,
Head Case Files/Little Brenda ,
Head Case Files/Stephen's Snow, Stupid Snow ,
Palumbo[?] ,
Thelma Addison's Confusion/More Stoned ,
Balogne Bulletin/Aug 2 ,
Schoolyard Scope[?] ,
Slowpoke ,
The Thousand Dollar Man ,
Le Miscreant ,
The Downsizer ,
Balogne Bulletin/Sep 30 ,
High School Sacramental ,
Balogne Bulletin/Nov 14 ,
Balogne Bulletin/Nov 21 ,
Balogne Bulletin/Nov 25 ,
Smile-Rite Face Mold ,
Balogne Bulletin/Nov 28 ,
Wilde on Absinthe ,
Bum Steer[?] ,
Balogne Bulletin/Dec 5 ,
Balogne Bulletin/Dec 12 ,
The Poisoning of Sir Guy Lombardy ,
Balogne Bulletin/Dec 19 ,
Balogne Bulletin/Dec 30 ,
Balogne Bulletin/Jan 09/16 ,
Lord of the Fruit Flies ,
Pretty Boy ,
the Code Breakers of Stanley Park ,
Slander! ,
the Pathogena Hair Defense System ,
Camp Jesus ,
Madame Pompadu ,
other works
(Poems:)
Charlotte Harlequin ,
Entropy's Date ,
False Prophet, the ,
First Unholy Roman Emperor, the ,
Iniquia ,
Marnie Blarneystone ,
Mistress Nemesis ,
Puritan, the ,
Queen Frig ,
Redeemer, the ,
Restless One, the ,
Rosemary Jones ,
The Vindictive ,
The Octiverse ,
other works
humor, poetry, music
2004-13
Seal
Bad News , Beguiled
music
2007-15
Shards, the
Virtue , Lifeless
music
2007-13
Simpsons, the
Its the Grand Pumpkin, Milhouse ,
Cold Blooded Marriage , Lady in Waiting , The Herald (Part V - the Abbey) , the Pay Toilet , Ghost in Space? - or was that Family Guy's theft?, Superficialman , plus offline works: 'Alaska Nebraska', and other works
humor
2007-13
Stewart, Jon
See the Daily Show
humor
2007-13
Swift, Taylor
Ooga Balooga , Spellbound , Careful , Respect , Dignity
music
2007-13
Telus Corporation
Friend in Need
music
2008-2010
Tonight Show, the
(Statements and Sketches: )
The Roachademy , the D.S. Show theme song , Sketched in Stone , Hazbrollah Is Love , Flying Legends , Dear Harry , Freaky Possibilities , Virtue (Shards fraudcast of my song) , Groundbreakers of Aviation , D.S. Show 1: Ep. 8 , D.S. Show 1: Ep. 15 , D.S. Show 2: Ep. 3 , Cave Art Epilogue , Tyke Force , Ancient Wisdom: Technology , All the Best Drivers , Domestic Life (currently offline), Lost Opportunity, Flimsy Barriers, Test of Patients, Money Talks, many other works
(Poems: )
Jackie the Pro , the Trail Blazer
humor, poetry, music
2007-2013
Vancouver Sun, the
Front page 'Sunshine Corner'
personal prose
2007
Yoakum, Dwight
Together Again
music
2007
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